Dear Oakley Wire 2.0,
I try to never love anything that can't love me back, but I think you can actually love me, so...
I love you. I really love you. You've benchmarked my life more than you will ever understand.
You've been with me through 26.2 miles, Emory Peak numerous times, Wheeler Peak, so many backpacking trips I can't remember and Estes Peak in the cold rain. We've been kayaking in the Gulf of Mexico; spent time, just you and me, on nude beaches. San Francisco, Sturgis, and the Caribbean, many drunken trips down the Guadalupe...and the following 6th street binges.
We've spent, probably, 10,000 miles running together and over 80,000 miles on a bike.
You've outlasted a fantastic marriage. Sorry about that overnight trip to Lew Sterrett.
Also I want to apologize for not remembering our first date. But pictures of us go as far back as the White Rock Marathon in 1996. So I'm going to call it 13+ years. Who in this world doesn't lose a pair of sunglasses in 13 years? I assure you, you were my only one during that time. And you should know that, because we've been together everyday of that 13+ years. EVERYDAY!
I never cheated, I never even LOOKED at another pair of sunglasses. I remember, twice, your earsocks and nose pieces were threadbare. I called Oakley and they sent new ones ($5.95 included shipping) on two-day delivery.
Then several months ago we had the same problem. I, as usual, called Oakley and they immediately responded. But this time with the wrong nosepieces. I called customer service and let them know the problem and they sent a "fix-it all-maintenance kit". They overnighted it. No charge.
But it still didn't work. It seems you're discontinued as well as your replacement parts.
I've done everything I can think of to patch this thing together including SuperGlu, but I don't think we'll be able to continue. So I'm moving on. Tonight I've ordered the Half Wire 2.0.
Just a reminder, I love you and always will.
Sincerely and with undying love,